Weapons of Mass Destruction
This summer Marc and I went to a few State Agricultural fairs. At one of the fairs, I saw a woman on a raised platform wearing a speaker’s microphone while she stood in front of a pile of near-naked vegetables.
“No way,” I said to Marc as I pulled him to a stop. “She’s demonstrating peelers. Let’s go watch.”
My first tip-off should have been that no one, absolutely no one else was around her.
My second tip-off should have been the Band-Aid on her finger.
“That’s not from the peeler, is it?” Asked Marc who laughed because the thought was so ridiculous – a demonstrator of peelers who cut herself – now wouldn’t that be silly.
Well let’s just say that sometimes reality can be a lot funnier than anything this writer could have come up with. Yup, she hadn’t been paying attention and she had sliced her finger on a peeler.
“Sometimes, you just have to make do with what you have,” she said as she waved her finger aside ready to start her presentation.
Marc and I both should have walked away but the sense of the absurd held us.
She demonstrated the peeler (keeping her injured digit gently raised and out of the cutting area.)
“It’s really very simple,” she droned, “if you hold it this way , it peels, if you hold it another way it dices. And if you use this tool,” she expertly pulled out another device that looked suspiciously similar, “you can grate your vegetables to make slaw with NO messy clean-up.”
Not only did it do all that, but these magical peelers also:
- Removed eyes from potatoes
- Could be used by right or left handers
- Were Swiss Engineered
And to top it all off, these peelers were high recommended for use by Arthritis and Rheumatism suffers. I didn’t have either of those conditions but who knows what coming down the road, right? Best to be prepared.
“Marc, we have to get this,” I said picturing the two cabbages that were sitting on our counter being easily grated into slaw. Continue reading